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Curvy People Are the Majority, Not The Minority
A recent survey revealed that over three quarters' of women are dissatisfied with their bodies. Not surprisingly, three quarters of women are normal and do not look like the impossibly emaciated images splashed across the media. However, when the media are still ignorantly conveying the message that ultra-thin is the acceptable size, it's no wonder that so many of us suffer from body image crises.
The truth is, of course, as the above statistics demonstrate, that curvy is the majority and not the minority and it's time that the perpetrators of the "only skeletal is acceptable" crime climb down from their celery towers and take a look at real women in the real world.
Occasionally, a magazine makes a token effort to cover a fashion feature for larger women, or a fashion designer puts a larger model on the catwalk, yet what does this tell the world? Yes, that larger is not normal, but that in order to avoid being accused of size discrimination, the thin activists are doing their duty in making an effort to represent what they consider to be the minority.
When the movie, "Bridget Jones's Diary" took the world by storm, it ridiculed the fat phobics by proving that you don't have to look like a supermodel to be successful and capture the man of your dreams!
If all sizes and features were represented equally, society would more readily accept that any image is agreeable and that there are no confines to the definition of beauty. A crooked nose is just as attractive as a straight one, a size 20 body is just as attractive as a size 10 body, wrinkles are just as beautiful as smooth, unblemished skin and every hair, eye and skin colour is appealing.
The most important factor of all, of course, is that irrespective of the outer core, true beauty emanates from within.
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hy Real Men Prefer Larger WomenWho was it who first said that "thin is acceptable, fat is not"? No doubt some camp, pot-bellied fashion designer or advertising executive who has helped to fuel insecurity and self-abuse by propagating the idea that in order to be successful and loved, you have to look undernourished. RUBBISH!
Forget dieting, body wraps, pills, lotions and gruelling exercise programmes. Why? Because there really are a lot of decent, attractive and successful men out there who prefer larger women - even those who don't care to admit it!
The reason why so many women still believe that men desire emaciated women is because they have been brainwashed by the media into believing that this is the shape they're supposed to find appealing. They play along with this ideal because of its apparent status value. Some men superficially believe that being seen with someone who represents the current images spread across the glossies will automatically elevate them to super stud ranking. Nevertheless, deep down, most of them would prefer to snuggle up to a curvy, feminine woman.
David, 31, an Art Director from London agrees; "To say that only women who are a size 10 or less are beautiful is a fallacy. I don't find women who are too thin at all sexy. There's something strangely unnatural about men who prefer women with boy-like physiques. To me, there's nothing more beautiful than a woman with ample curves. Who wants to cuddle up to a skeleton at night? I dated one girl who was totally obsessive about her weight, despite my reassurances that she looked far better with a 'bit of meat' on her. The relationship didn't last because she was always too busy worrying about how she looked and ended up spending more time in front of the mirror than she did with me!"
American Psychologist, Catrin Griffiths says, "We live in a society obsessed by control, thinness and youth. Fatness is therefore regarded as a loss of control and ultimate failure, particularly since men who are status-driven feel the need to parade a partner who fits the current ideal. Subconsciously, however, men are naturally drawn towards women with rounded hips, which is a sign of their ability to carry and nurture their offspring. The paradox is that today's women are striving for independence and strength and yet the emaciated body type signifies frailty, defencelessness and a need to be cared for."
If a woman is naturally petite and has not "forced" her shape and size, then that is fine and she undoubtedly looks her best when she is a size 8 or 10. However, what looks unnatural is a tall woman, who would naturally be a size 16, diets obsessionally and ends up looking unhealthily emaciated, with bones sticking out from every angle.
Michael, 28, a web designer had this to say; "If thin and shapeless is desirable, then why do so many women opt for breast enlargement? Yes, because most men prefer shapely women, yet what a lot of these women fail to grasp is that large breasts do not naturally fit a thin body. If a large bust is considered attractive, doesn't it follow that larger proportions overall are appealing?"
"There's nothing attractive about a chest that so obviously looks false," says Darren, 28. "Any man who finds breast implants attractive, would be better off nestling up to a lump of silicone at night, because that's all he's in love with, not the woman herself. Besides, abnormally spherical silicone breasts attached to the front of a matchstick physique look odd. Being a woman is not just about having breasts, it means being blessed with the well-rounded, childbearing buttocks that men find so attractive and possessing all those other little quirks and personality traits that make a woman what she is.
As Rob, 36, an Air Force pilot points out, "There's nothing more off-putting than taking a woman out to a nice restaurant and then watching her pick at her food all night, especially when I want to tuck into my food without feeling guilty about the fact that I actually enjoy eating. Generally, if a woman enjoys her food, it's a sign that she has a good appetite for other things!"
Women were never designed to have figures like adolescent boys, donning androgynous attire, making statements about equality and indirectly expressing the fear of being labelled 'feminine'. If women were designed to look like men, Mother Nature would have made the human race hermaphrodites who reproduced asexually.
Top marks go to larger than average celebrities, such as Kate Winslet, Camryn Mainheim, Mo' nique and Oprah (just to name a few!) for example, who are comfortable with their size and who refuse conform to, what the media regard as, the ideal shape or, more accurately, non-shape. Kate Winslet, Camryn Mainheim, Mo'nque and Oprah are voluptuous, outgoing, funny and amazingly beautiful women. And their confidence with their body image is what makes them both incredibly sexy.
James, 26, a Software Engineer says, "I'm not saying that big women aren't concerned about their appearance, but they are not totally consumed like a lot of model look-a-likes are. Larger women focus more on their personalities and emanate a quality that says, 'Hey, I'm fun to be with, I know how to enjoy life', as opposed to their thin counterparts who are often afraid to let themselves go in case they put a hair out of place. There's something so unbelievably sexy about a voluptuous woman with a larger than life personality. Given the choice of Kate Moss or Kate Winslett, I'd choose Kate Winslett any day."
Besides, what woman in their right mind would want to be involved with someone as superficial as the fat-prejudiced guy who said, "You can't walk a personality down the street"? How could you possibly feel secure in a relationship that revolved totally around your body image? And of course, you can walk a personality down the street. People with a personality exude an aura without having to open their mouths and without being 3 inches wide. The guy who disputes that probably has less personality than a stuffed rat.
I believe that the real message here is to learn to accept your body the way that it is and not to go against the shape that Mother Nature intended. After all, whatever your shape and size, everyone has the potential to be attractive and desirable.
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Fill out the Contact Form Below or at Bottom of page and you will receive a FREE Newletter filled with Great Tips, News, Personal stories from myself and other BBW - Curvy Divas on the subjets of Work, Play, Dating, Success! and more. Please use a valid email address to receive your FREE stuff
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